practice

I had this student once who gave me, at the end of the semester, the comic book he'd made. It was explicit and sad, about picking up a prostitute and being unable to fuck her, unable to talk to her, and it was dedicated to me. black, white and grey.

he was a smart, forthright young guy, often very quiet in class but when something grabbed at his opinions he spoke passionately, at length, looking around for the other kids to catch up to him and respond. After silence he would sit back with a slight sigh, go back to his own silence.

but in his quietness he was never entirely settled - he had a pronounced tic, a contraction that ran from the left corner of his mouth down to his shoulder. it was worse when he was preparing to speak, sometimes so strong that for cover he would divert the movement into something else, scratching his face or looking for something in his bag.

I tried out the movement on my own a few times, in my office and at home. it was like an exaggerated version of the 'ugh' grimace that people do with one corner of the mouth, but with a full neck movement. since then I find that the grimace comes easily and strongly, at unexpected moments, and when I do it I think of him. the last panel had his two characters sitting at far ends of a sofa, with dark all around them, in  companionable silence.